40 Days of Personal Revolution: Week 4

wait a second! I missed week 3!? Actually I did not miss week three (which focused on equanimity - "the art of meeting life calmly, without drama or fuss"), but boy was it BUSY!! Days one and two were on par with the rest of my 40 days, but starting on Friday, I was in the mountains with 14 of my closest friends skiing for three days to celebrate my 30th birthday!!!

We had three ABSOLUTELY gorgeous days on the mountain (one day at Beaver Creek and two at Vail) and it was the best 30th Birthday I could have ever asked for!!!

 

 5 girls in a tub for two hours...?? yes it was as amazing as it sounds!

 

 

 me and my best bunny!

 

(my amazing home made birthday card from Ashley!!)

After a full day of skiing on Sunday, I finally made it home at 8pm only to leave town on Monday morning for a 4-day trip to Boston - definitely was not excited about the trip, but I gots to pay those bills! 

I have to admit, it was really tough to keep up with the program with almost an entire a week away from home, but I just promised myself that I would do the best I could and not punish myself for not being perfect... and I think it went pretty well. I did manage to get yoga and meditation in on Friday (although I skipped Saturday and Sunday) and then I did all of my yoga and almost all of my meditation in Boston (including two airplane meditation sessions, one visit to a local yoga studio and a couple hotel yoga sessions)

(hotel yoga is not very glamorous or inspiring, but sometimes it's' the best you can do!)

Now that I'm back, it is time to start week 4, where the focus is on Restoration... which is EXACTLY what I need after a totally crazy week 3, so I'm super excited about how it has worked out.  This week includes a three-day fruit cleanse (which I will do on the last three days of the week, sparing myself from the futile task of trying to eat only fruit on Super Bowl Sunday!)

In week four, Baron asks us to "stay in the moment and relax in all of your activities" I have no doubt that all of this relaxing is going to take some work! A lot of mindfulness, patience with myself, and practice, but it is definitely something I need and so I'm happy to have this week as a means to focus on this part of my life. 

2013 was an absolutely INSANE year for me, I traveled 130 days, which is just crazy, and even though a lot of those trips were personal ones and were SUPER fun and amazing, it still made for a very hectic life.  At the beginning of 2014 I made somewhat of a resolution to clam down this year, reduce the number of obligations in my life (even those that are personal and fun like dinner parties and trips to the mountains) and just in general slow down a bit. But now here we are one month into the new year and already I have something planned for every weekend through to March!

So Week 4 of my 40 Days to Personal Revolution is a great time to REALLY focus on sitting still in life, relaxing in the everyday, reducing the number of things on my plate, and as Baron says, to "learn to pace myself, to learn when to retreat and escape from the daily grind and take some time to clear my head, rest my body, and restore my soul." And so that is what I plan to do this week!

I'll be back again blogging soon, because there are a lot of great things in the laws of transformation for this week and last week that I want to share with you, but for now, it's back to work for me! Till next time, Namaste!

Check out this awesome "Magic Carpet Yoga Mat" my mom got me for my birthday! It is totes cray!!! :-) Thanks Momma!!!

40 Days to Personal Revolution: When the going gets tough, the tough get going!

Now that I am 13 days in to my 40-day program, I can see why we are working on Laws 3&4 in week two... because things are getting a little bit uncomfortable and this thing definitely takes commitment!

As I've gone through the week, I've tried to keep in mind this paragraph from Law 4: Commit to Growth

Are you experiencing cravings? instead of reaching out, just stay with them. Is anxiety rising? Stay. Are fear and anger out of control? Stay. Are your muscles quaking, are you running out of steam? Stay anyway. Are your hips screaming in pigeon pose? okay, but stay. We are the only ones who know and hear our internal dialogues, and we are the only ones who can make the choice to stay and unfold. Almost always, there is a breakthrough waiting for you right over the horizon.

So how am I doing?  Well, the program essentially has four components:

1. Journaling (through weekly "excavation questions")
2. Twice daily meditation practice
3. Daily yoga
4. Diet changes

I've got the journaling thing down, but that only needs to be done once per week (or maybe a couple times, if you don't do it all in one sitting).  Here is a look at how I'm faring with the rest of it (which require attention every single day!):

Yoga:  So far I am doing great with my yoga attendance. I did 8 yoga classes in the first week (taking one day completely off and doubling up twice).  BUT just a day or two into the second week I was feeling absolutely exhausted.  I decided not to double up at all this week and again completely took Sunday off.  My wrists were hurting earlier in the week (probably because I wasn't using proper form all of the time, but also because I spent a lot of time working on my hand stands) and in general I was feeling pretty exhausted.  I took yesterday off and am feeling much better today, so I'm ready to get back to class tonight, but I must admit that I was surprised that even for myself (someone who already was working out 5-7 days/week often times with much more vigorous activity than yoga), daily yoga is definitely a challenge!

Meditation:  Woof... this is also a challenge.  Working from home certainly helps, I'm rarely running late in the morning, so my first daily session is not much of a struggle for me.  I basically get out of bed, use the washroom, and immediately do my meditation.  The evening.. that is another story.  I'm tired, maybe cranky, I'd rather hang out with Nick, or maybe I just want to watch a new episode of Grey's Anatomy.... there could be 1,000 excuses not to meditate on any given night, but that is really all they are: excuses.  So far Wed / Thurs / Friday I did get in two sessions of meditation, Saturday I did just one, Sunday I didn't do any!!! (GASP!) and today I'm back on track...  so we'll see how it all goes, but this one is a bit of a chore for me.

As far as the duration, last week we did 5 minute sessions and that was absolutely a piece of cake. This week is 10 minutes and I'm meeting it with mixed feelings.  I spend a good chunk of time acknowledging that my mind has wandered and bringing it back to the present moment... and then finding that my mind has wandered again, and bringing it back... and again and again. It is certainly a practice and I am definitely a novice...  but it is a work in progress.

Diet:  This week the goals for the diet are to incorporate more whole foods into your diet. The goal is for what you eat to look as close as possible to what it looked like when it came from it's source: whole fruits and veggies, whole grains, unprocessed lean cuts of meat....  The first day I was a little overwhelmed thinking about all the places I could / should change what I eat, but thankfully Katy talked me down on Wednesday night and suggested to the group that we simply commit to making one or two substitutions in our diet for the week, like substituting cheese for a piece of whole fruit.

Her advice reminded me of what it said in the book: to listen to your body and slowly make small sustainable changes - change begets change and I need to be careful not to over do it and then sabotage the whole thing for myself... so this week I focused just on two things: reducing the amount of processed cereal grains I eat (mainly bread but also cereal which I like to eat on the weekends), and reducing the amount of processed dairy (yogurt and cheese) that I eat. There is definitely room for improvement in my diet, but I must admit that I have eaten a TON more fruits and veggies this week than last week, so I think so far this is a success.... (except for yesterday when I ate pizza for lunch and chicken wings and a sampler of fried appetizers for dinner!)

All in all things are going well, it has been a challenge, but one that I think is really good and productive for me. I absolutely love my yoga studio and I love to go there every day and see all the other transformers in the studio, so that definitely helps me to stay on track.  Now that I'm into this, I also see why it is important to go to the little meetings we have on Wednesday evenings, because this is a lot of work and the camaraderie that comes with doing it in a group is definitely a motivator.
Starting Friday I will be on the road (first on a birthday ski trip and then to Boston for work) for almost an entire week, so things are about to get tricky, but so far I'm pretty happy with how well I've stuck to the program and I'm ready to head to my next yoga class.. which starts in 25 minutes!  

40 Days to Personal Revolution: Week 2 Begins

Whoop Whoop, here comes week two in my 40 Days to Personal Revolution journey! 

Week one was wonderful, I even got my first ever solo scorpion pose (albeit with a little help from the wall!) 

I am super excited about Week Two (with the theme Vitality) and this morning I completed my first 10-minute meditation and am happy to report that it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. 

One of the things that has me most excited about week two is that I was really inspired by this week's "Laws of Transformation" and I want to share some of it with you.  

The first is Law 3: Step out of Your Comfort Zone, let me share some of Baron's words with you:

The comfort zone may feel cozy and familiar, but it is like a sweet poison, silently killing off our childlike spontaneity and our vitality. When we choose our comfort zone over growth we get stuck or worse, because ultimately we are either awakening and growing or numbing out and spiraling downward. Life is never static - we either grow or we die.

....

If we don't step out of the known - the comfort zone - we bring yesterday's limited thinking into the present, therefore dooming the present to be just like the past. We will keep repeating and doing the same things again and again, getting the same results, and then complain, "Nothing ever changes in my life." .... We seek proof of why we can't change, and all kinds of reasons why we won't let go of our dramas, stresses, resentments, fears, or self-destructive ways of being.

That is some great stuff! But still, it can leave you thinking 'yeah that is great, I should break out of my comfort zone, but what does that really mean, how do I go about doing that.... easier said than done Baron!"

But thankfully the chapter doesn't end there, he goes on to explain that "stepping out of our comfort zone has more to do with the simplicity of forgiveness and self-honesty than it does with a grandiose breaking out of some box."  It's not about dropping everything and traveling the world, or putting yourself into uncomfortable situations, it's about being honest with yourself about where you are comfortable, how have you cornered yourself into comfortable patterns in life that aren't serving your best interests and then acknowledging those patterns, and letting go of them (like a security blanket) to make room for a better future for ourselves.  He says, "We veer away from taking that journey inward and therefore out of our comfort zone, not realizing that the way out is in."

Law 4: Commit to Growth was a great follow up, because let's face it... change is hard. It is a constant struggle to stay out of your comfort zone and commit to long term change, and once you've incorporated one small change in your life, and gotten comfortable again, to make another change and commit to that.  

So Law 4 encourages us to focus on making the decision to grow (to step out of our comfort zone) and then to remain steadfast with ourselves, our commitments, and our personal revolutions.

Never making a decision is a decision unto itself. If is a decision to stay in a personal fog. Staying in the confusion is safe, because in the fog, we never have to face the mundane that comes with committing to a path. Everyone tries to avoid the mundane path, but that is the path that makes us grow.

......

When we practice yoga and meditation, when we practice staying clear and conscious around food, or when we stay conscious of our reactions in all our relationships, we are strengthening our ability to be steadfast with ourselves. We are in discipleship. The word disciple comes from the same root as discipline. to be a disciple of your revolutions means to be committed fully to doing the right thing, learning the lessons, and being open to the whole range of experiences that arise along the path. 

And he encourages us to stick with it when things get hard - because "almost always there is a breakthrough waiting for you right over the horizon."

As you can see, I'm starting Week Two of my Personal Revolution off with a bang - really excited to try and focus my energy for the next 7 days on stepping out of my comfort zone and committing to growth.   

And so, as I begin my second week, I will leave you with an inspirational video I found on a fellow yogi's blog.... Yoga Rocks!!

 

40 Days to Personal Revolution: Week 1 Wrap Up

Tomorrow is my last day of week 1, so I thought it would be a good time to check back and see how week 1 of my 40-day Personal Revolution has been coming along.  

this is the wall outside my yoga studio, it says "you are beautiful"

Amazingly I have actually done everything I was supposed to do, including meditating twice a day for 5 minutes each. 

So far the meditating is going pretty well, it is not difficult at all for me to do it in the morning, a little more difficult to find time away to do it in the evening (I prefer to do it when no one else is in the apartment, so it's hard for me to motivate myself and to focus when Nick is home), but 5 minutes is really a cake-walk when it comes to meditating.  However, I can tell that this is really going to be the biggest challenge for me moving forward.  Next week is 10 minutes twice a day and the program builds to 30 minutes twice a day by the end... woof! That is a big time commitment - and I would be lying if I said I wasn't intimidated by it!

I think the thing that will help the most will be finding good guided meditation tracks because staying present, with a clear mind for 5 minutes is definitely doable - but I really don't know how I'll be able to handle 30... I guess that is why the program takes it's time building up from 5, so I am going to really try to stick with it and see if this meditation thing is all it's cracked up to be. 

As I mentioned in my last post, the theme of this week was presence, and I did work really hard to try and be more present in my daily life this week.  The biggest thing for me was to make a conscious decision to keep my phone tucked away instead of out in front of me all the time - because I think my phone and iPad are really the biggest hurdles I have to being present most of the time.  Another thing I focused on was trying to really be present during life's most mundane points, which is when I tend to check-out the most: running errands (for example, standing in line at the post office - try to be present AND not be annoyed... now that is a challenge for any zen master), sitting on my couch with Nick, trudging through emails at work... really trying not to let any moment slip by unnoticed.  It's definitely a challenge and I certainly didn't succeed in every moment in the last week, but I think even a small change in perspective and presence is a success.  I expect that being present all the time is a life-long challenge that I don't think anyone can accomplish in just 7 days. 

Whether it was just the excitement of the first 5 days, the meditation, the food diary we  are all supposed to keep, or simply the active practice of being present, I definitely notice that I am already making better food choices and being much more mindful of what I am putting into my body. I didn't make any big changes this week, but I am gearing up for the second week which focuses on incorporating more whole foods into my diet and avoiding processed foods. 

 

One of my "green monster" smoothies I've been drinking: spinach, an orange, and apple, pineapple, coconut milk, arbonne fiber boost, arbonne digestion plus w/ probiotics, flax seeds, and chia seeds.. YUM!

Of course, my favorite part of the whole thing is all the yoga I get to do. I took a day off on Saturday (since we are supposed to be giving ourselves one day off per week), but have still done 6 yoga classes in 5 days - I doubled up on Wednesday and Sunday.  I would pretty much spend all day doing Yoga if I could, I love it so much! Typically I ride my bike to Yoga, but it's been cold and snowy, so I've been using Denver's Car2Go to bop around the city and it is so fun and easy to use, I love it (PLUS look how freakin' cute the thing is!)

Anyway, I think week one was a success - I am still super excited about everything and am pretty proud of myself for sticking to it for 5 whole days! haha. Hopefully our weekly meetings and this blog will help me to stay committed for the next 35 - I have a feeling as time goes on it will become more and more challenging to stick to it. 

That's all for now, see you soon and Namaste! :-) 

40 Days to Personal Revolution: Here I Go! (Day 1)

I'm back again after a (too) long break from blogging, but I am super excited about the beginning of 2014 (I'm about to turn the big 3-0!!!) and to share with you my "40 Day Personal Revolution."  As many of you know, I started doing yoga a couple of years ago and have been ramping up my practice ever since. In 2013 I really picked up the pace and have been practicing regularly 2-4 times a week (occasionally 5 or 6 days in a week) for over a year now. 

Remember this pic of the day from April 2012?  I have to say my form is much improved these days!

and this one from November 2012?

Back in September, one of my favorite Yoga teachers, Katy Rowe, introduced me to The River Yoga studio and I have absolutely fallen in love with the space, so when the New Year came around and they had a '40 Days to Personal Revolution' workshop I knew right away I was going to sign up. 

The program goes through Baron Baptiste's book "40 Days to Personal Revolution: A Breakthrough Program to Radically Change Your Body and Awaken the Sacred Within Your Soul."  

(from amazon.com)

 

We will meet every Wednesday evening with Katy Rowe (who is leading the workshop) to go through the book, the intentions / goals for each week, and discuss the program. Tonight is our first meeting, but I've already started reading the book and I am so excited about it that I couldn't even wait until the meeting was over to get started writing about it. 

The theme for this week is presence - which I think is a WONDERFUL way to start the program. Particularly with our digital lives these days, I think that all of us could do with a little more presence in our daily routine (speaking of which, I saw this video today and I think it completely fits in with this week's theme)

(for some reason this video isn't showing in all browsers, here is a link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OINa46HeWg8)

The book has twelve laws of transformation (you focus on two each week) and this week our two laws to focus on are:

Law #1 Seek the truth - mainly seeking the truth about yourself and accepting that truth just as it is
Law #2 Be willing to come apart - this is about being willing to give up control (or the illusion of control) that we try to maintain over everything in our lives. Stop trying to fight through life forcing everything and everyone to conform to your own idea of how things should be and just letting go.

On top of that, I will be committing to yoga 6 days / week for the entire program, plus meditation twice / day, and reevaluating and transforming my diet.  It is going to be a lot of work.

I already have plans to go to yoga this evening at The River, and this morning I did my first 5 minute meditation session, which I guess was relatively successful. I think the meditation is something where I might just have to show up, trust the process, and see where it takes me. I have never really meditated before so this is something completely new to me, but I am really going to try to follow through for 40 days without judging it and I will decide at the end whether or not meditation is something I want to continue.

Finally the last component of the program is to transform your diet.  I actually started working n my diet a couple of months ago, changing things little by little - removing hormone-laden dairy, eating more organic and non-GMO food, etc. and so I'm really excited for the challenge and inspiration to take it another step further. On the flip side, I'm under no illusion that this is going to be easy and I'm more than a little apprehensive about the whole thing.  I feel like I have a generally healthy diet (for the most part) and it just takes so much darn work to think about what I'm eating instead of just mindlessly eating the same thing every day (like my egg sandwich for breakfast EVERY DAY)...  so I'm facing this portion of the program with both excitement and apprehension.

The nice thing is that the book really isn't giving you a specific diet. Instead he is encouraging you to be mindful of what you eat, listen to your body, and make small changes that are intuitive for yourself, so that is going to be my goal. Thankfully the diet portion for the first week is really more focused on mindfulness - noticing what your current eating patterns are - than about change (although we are of course encouraged to start making some small changes to balance out our diet)... so that should (hopefully) help me to ease into the whole thing.  

Ok well I guess that is all for now, I'm so excited about tonight but I need to be present in the now (and get to work)! I will leave you with another video that I found today... very fitting.

(again here is the video link if you can't see it in your browser: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-8IPDR4Khc)

Whole Foods Black Bean and Quinoa Salad

well... I'll be the first to agree it's been a LOOOONNNGG time since I've blogged. The summer was crazy and after all of that blogging and crafting for the wedding, I've been taking the last 5 months off - just enjoying married life and traveling all over the country w/ my fresh new husband!!

 

here's us on our honeymoon in Costa Rica

 

With my wedding finally over and my marriage beginning, I've returned to my first love on Pinterest, cooking!  In the last year I have become obsessed with Whole Foods Black Bean and Quinoa Salad available at their deli counter. It is absolutely AMAZING, but the problem is (1) it's kinda expensive and (2) they don't always have it since they rotate different things through their selection all the time.  SO, I took it upon myself to finally get my act together and try to make some myself this afternoon and... it turned out pretty darn good, if I do say so myself!! 

 

I googled recipes for imitation Whole Foods Black Bean and Quinoa Salad first (cuz I'm lazy) but I couldn't find anything that really looked like it would be exactly what I was looking for, so instead, I stole from two pretty close recipes, mixed them together and voila, I think I nailed it!

 

My two sources were Turn It On Cook on Tumblr: http://turnitoncook.tumblr.com/post/515743921/whole-foods-black-bean-quinoa-salad-i-love-the and Epicurious.com  http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Quinoa-and-Black-Bean-Salad-12245

 

 And now I present to you my version of Whole Foods Black Bean and Quinoa Salad - I think it's really the best of both worlds!

 

3 cups water
1 1/2 cup quinoa
1 can of black beans (rinsed)
1/2 large red bell pepper
3 sprigs of green onions
1 can of corn (rinsed)
1 1/2 tablespoons red-wine vinegar
several sprigs of cilantro (I didn't keep track)
Salt and Pepper to taste

For dressing

• 5 tablespoons fresh lime juice, or to taste
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1 1/4 teaspoons ground cumin, or to taste
• 1/3 cup olive oil

** I only ended up using about 3/4 of the dressing

Directions:

Bring 3 cups of water to a boil. Rinse the quinoa and add to boiling water, lower heat to a simmer and cook covered for 15 minutes. (in the future though, I think I'm going to try the Epicurous style of cooking quinoa which is  supposed to make it lighter and fluffier, here's how to do it:
------------------------------------------------------
In a saucepan of salted boiling water cook quinoa 10 minutes. Drain quinoa in sieve and rinse under cold water. Set sieve over a saucepan of boiling water (quinoa should not touch water) and steam quinoa, covered with a kitchen towel and lid, until fluffy and dry, about 10 minutes (check water level in kettle occasionally, adding water if necessary).
----------------------------------------------------------------
While the quinoa was cooking, I made the dressing by mixing all of those ingredients together. Then I cut up the pepper, onion, and cilantro. I also drained and rinsed the corn and drained and rinsed the black beans. Then I tossed the beans w/ the red wine vinegar and some salt and pepper to taste.

Once the quinoa was done, I drained the excess water (I think there was excess because I used a little more than was necessary) and rinsed it with cold water.  After that I tossed the quinoa with all of the ingredients and then poured in about 1/2 of the dressing I had made. I didn't want the salad to get too oily and I also thought the dressing would over power the salad so, as I said,  I only used about 3/4 of it, so I might make a little less next time.

And that was it. It made a huge bowl of the stuff and it is absolutely delicious and pretty darn close to what you can buy at Whole Foods.  With just me and Nick eating it, this recipe made enough to last an entire week too!

SOoooooooo excited to snack on it all week long! YUM!!!

A Moment to Remember

As many of you know, this past weekend the world lost an amazing person. Ryan Novak, one of the ushers in our wedding and one of my husband's dearest friends, died in an avalanche while back country skiing on Loveland Pass.

I only had the privilege of knowing Ryan for the last 6 years - I met him shortly after I started dating Nick back in 2007 - but in that time I had come to love him as a brother. It was hard not to; he was one of those people that just drew everyone in. His joy and zaniness was contagious, and you couldn't help but smile when he was around. 

Ryan was always a bit of a wildcard; we never quite knew when he would come through Denver, but we were always happy to see him when he did make it to town. His spirit uplifted all those around him, and a great time was gauranteed to follow anytime he was there. 

But it wasn't just that Ryan was fun to be around, I think what drew people to him was that he really was a beautiful soul. I never heard him speak or wish ill of any one else. Not a vindictive bone in his body, he didn't waste his time with negativity.  Through example, he taught everyone around him to live life to the fullest, enjoy every moment of it, and not to sweat the small stuff.  That will be his legacy.  

In this time of great sadness, what I am most grateful for is the time we had with him at our wedding last month.  My husband has an amazing group of friends from his childhood that he remains unbelievably close with to this day, despite the years and miles that separate them. They are truly a family in every sense of the word, and they showed up in full force for our wedding.
 
The time that they all had together, only one month before Ryan's passing, will be something that we all cherish for the rest of our lives.  Absolutely no one on this earth could replace Ryan in the hearts and minds of those who knew him, he was truly one of-a-kind.



With less than three days having passed since the avalanche, it is hard to take any consolation in the fact that he died doing what he loved. It is hard to take comfort in the idea that he may have been looking down on us as we gathered this weekend to support each other and remember the good times. They say that time heals all wounds... and deep down we all know this is true, but at the moment, this too offers no solace. There are just no words that can describe the deep loss that is felt by those who knew this beautiful person.

It is with heavy hearts that we all head back to Honesdale this weekend to lay him to rest. Life will go on, the world will continue to turn, but it will never be quite the same again.

We love you Novs....

Our Ceremony: A View From Vista Ridge (Granby Ranch)

(Well, I know you've already seen the view, but now that I've got some professional shots of the wedding, I thought I'd share some more :-)

Vista Ridge at Granby Ranch was the only wedding venue that Nick and I looked at after we got engaged. (Remember my post?) I believe my exact words when I saw the site were "holy f*cking sh*t this is gorgeous) and just like that, our decision was made. It was everything I could have ever dreamed of for a ceremony site, and we could not have gotten luckier with the beautiful day that we had!

One of the greatest things about the site is that, while it is on top of a ski mountain (remember we had to take lift to get there)

There is actually an aspen grove separating the ceremony site from the ski slopes, so we were completely secluded from the resort and shielded from the wind and the noise of the skiers.

In order to get to the ceremony site, you have to walk down a little path through the aspens

and it almost feels like you are discovering a well-kept secret when you finally come through the trees and get your first glimpse of the amazing view.

speaking of first glimpse, check out my groom as he tries to get his first look at his bride walking down the aisle toward him... I love this picture!

after my long walk through the grove and down the aisle, I have my dad the biggest hug I could (I love my daddy so much!)

and then went to greet my groom - I'm so happy I can barely stand it!

And then there we were; just as my invitation  had said, "two crazy people on a mountain top, vowing to love each other for a lifetime."  Standing within feet of the edge of the mountain, it felt like we were on top of the world.

 

Our dear friend, and the person who introduced us to each other, Brian Clark, was our officiant, and he did an amazing job. 

We had planned to have a short ceremony - mostly because we had no idea what the weather would be like and we didn't want our guests to freeze their little tushies off - but once we were actually preforming the ceremony, it went so fast I couldn't even believe it. It felt like it went by in the blink of an eye, and before I knew it, it was time for me to say my vows.

I hadn't cried when I wrote them, and I didn't cry when I practiced them, so I must say I was a little stunned when I opened my mouth to recite them to Nick and could barely get a word out.  And so, in surprise and frustration, and through my tears, I blurted out "shit!" right in the middle of my wedding ceremony! (very classy Rachel!) 

In the end, though, I guess was pretty perfect for our ceremony! Everyone in attendance (except maybe my in-laws) already knows what a potty-mouth I have, and I'm pretty sure no one was shocked to hear that word come out of my mouth, regardless of the situation.  As you can probably tell by the picture, we all had a good laugh at that one, and I carried on with my vows to Nick.



(I love this picture so much because of all of our guests smiling in the background AND they're wearing ski goggles! Really could it get better than that!?)

 

After I finished my vows, it was Nick's turn

 His vows were beautiful and brought on the water works for every single one of our bridesmaids

 
 

But I was so happy at that moment, you couldn't have smacked the smile off of my face. Here I was standing in the most beautiful spot I could imagine, with an amazing man - who is a more perfect match for me than I could have ever dreamed up myself - and surrounded by all of our closest friends and familiy he was declaring his love for me... how could I do anything but smile!?  

At the end of Nick's vows, he grabbed a hold of my hands and leaned in for a kiss! "Not yet!" I said, and we we all hand another little chuckle. I hope our guests were all having as much fun as we were! Next of course it was time for the rings.

It was at this point, though, that I realized that Brian didn't write down what were were supposed to say for the rings ceremony because Nick and I were just supposed to say it - not repeat after him - and I didn't know what we were supposed to say because I just figured that Brian would have it in his notes. (This misunderstanding was completely my fault, by the way!) And so Nick and I spent a couple of "o shit" seconds trying to figure out what we were going to say, and we settled on "just hurry up and say anything!"  I'm sure no one plans to be put on the spot during their wedding ceremony, but these things tend to happen, and so in a very intimate and unplanned moment, we whispered to each other as we put on the rings. Nick told me to "wear this as a sign of my appreciation for you"

And then after I figured out which finger was on Nick's left hand... I told him to "wear this ring as a symbol of my love."



Following the rings, there were some beautiful closing remarks from Brian, and then...it was over. It went so fast, I really couldn't even believe what was happening when he pronounced us husband and wife!

and then, Nick kissed his bride, and I became Mrs. Stachokus!

Just as we finished our kiss, Stevie Wonder's "Signed, Sealed, Delivered" came on the sound system and we danced down the aisle in celebration

And that, by far, was the happiest moment in my life.... to date.